Cheating can be such a traumatic experience when one is invested in a spouse and likely planning to be together for a very long time. While many people do not easily realize when they are dealing with a cheating spouse, the odds are you may have missed out on hints because the cheating partner is doing all they can to cover their tracks.
Some studies have shown that there are many reasons people in relationships cheat ranging from anger, self-esteem issues, neglect, unmet needs, need for variety, and an insatiable need to explore.
While many own up to issues and seek ways of making the relationship work, many more resort to hiding signs. Oddly, some of these signs may have been noticeable to you but you did not put the clue together. For others who don’t know what to look for, things like hiding messages, hiding who they are cheating with, changing passwords, and generally withholding information.
Things a Cheating Spouse Doesn’t Want You to Know
1. Information About Certain Things
Information is one of the key things that makes relationships work. However, it is also one of the many things that a cheating spouse can use to hide infidelity. They control the information they share with you. They control things about where they are, whom they are with, and what they did.
However, there are experienced cheaters who may be able to account for every waking minute and you must be very keen to know when their explanations do not add up.
2. Phones
The greatest asset of a cheating partner is their phone. It is a memory bank of all their moves and activities. As it is, they would do whatever it takes to keep it away from their spouse.
Pay close attention to how agitated they become when you get close to it or try to borrow it. Though your intention may be to get a better cell signal, they are likely to read it as snooping because they are guilty of infidelity.
For those that allow you to have it, they take the extra precaution of passwording ‘shady’ areas.
If you think you have figured their phones out, then don’t be surprised that they have a second phone that you are not even aware of.
3. Financial Spending
A couple’s finances are a mini detail of their life history and we say this because it reflects in things they purchase like groceries, gifts, subscriptions, hangouts, holidays, and payment for spa treatment.
Considering this, a cheating spouse is sure to cover their financial tracks to avoid questions about their spending. To place emphasis, their spending will reveal bills for gifts, hotel stays, or even restaurant bills.
Needless to say, do not be shocked that there are cheaters who choose to use cash to make payments to cover their trail.
4. Secret Folders on Devices
Some cheating partners may allow you to have access to their devices but it would take a lot of snooping for you to locate the files that will implicate them.
How do they do this? They have hidden folders where they archive or lock sensitive information that would reveal their cheating.
5. Hiding their Digital Footprints
A cheating spouse will want to hide all traces of what they do using technology such as incognito search tools or Virtual Private Networks(VPN). Though some will clear an entire browsing history, cheaters with experience will take out only fishy items to avoid raising suspicion or even browsing using tools that hide their activity.
For instance, deleting an entire browsing history would send a warning alarm to your other half but being discreet and taking out only the fishy ones takes away suspicion. Also, browsing in incognito mode does not trace a cheater’s activity.
6. Hiding The Person They are Cheating With
The whole point of hiding infidelity is so you don’t find out. A cheating spouse will do all it takes to keep the identity of who they are cheating with unknown.
You may be wondering why they go to such lengths. It’s likely because they are cheating with someone you know; maybe a work colleague or even someone they presented as a family member.
Moreover, it is said that about 20-25% of infidelities in marriage occur with a close personal friend.
7. Alternative Social Media Accounts
Social media has settings to include people’s relationship status and often partners use this to show the world who they are with. However, cheaters have found a way of seedy affairs by creating other social media accounts where they keep the partners in their lives away.
8. Hiding Text Messages
Aside from keeping secret files, some cheating spouses are likely to hide their text messages and the trail they leave of infidelity. To avoid exposure, they delete these messages and make their inbox clean.
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9. Their Pattern of Cheating
A serial cheater may have done it in a previous relationship and if anything, they would hide this part of their life from their spouse. Experienced cheaters are said to have likely cheated in previous relationships and may continue with you.
Therefore, they hide the pattern of their cheating from you so you don’t find out about their illicit affairs.
10. Change in Sexual Orientation
In relationships, a spouse is likely to cheat after discovering that they have a change of sexual orientation.
First things first, some people get married for convenience so they can hide their sexuality. In such cases, they continue to cheat with a partner from the real sexuality they identify with while others get married before having a change in sexual orientation.
In the case of the latter, many do not disclose their change in sexual orientation and they are likely to continue cheating for a long time.